12.12

Work is better but then again my patients were relatively easy.  Still, some improvements so the future doesn't seem to be so bleak.  I'm getting the hang of it.

Went to the doctor for my cough, apparently I have asthma.  I only use my inhaler once in a while but I have noticed a change when I do use it.  Strange.  When I told my mom about it, she mentioned I've had asthma since I was little.  It would've been good to know that.  Oh well.  It's manageable right now.

I found a great coffee place by work.  Well, I didn't find it.  My new work friends (girls from my orientations group) told me about it.  They have really great coffee.  And the people that work there are SUPER nice.  It's almost as if I wasn't in New York.

I just found out this guy I like is single.  Too bad he's all the way in SoCal.  Story of my life.

12.11

<-- This is probably how my preceptor felt last Friday.  Sigh.  It was my first day on the floor and she apparently thought she was precepting someone with bone marrow transplant experience and not a new grad.  G-r-eee-aaa-ttt... and on top of that, she seemed to be having a bad day.  What does all this mean for me?  That I felt stupid and I felt like I was disappointing her.  Sigh.

1. I do not have experience with IVs. 
2. It doesn't help that you talk too fast.
3. I am not a question-asker by nature.  I just don't ask questions.  I ruminate.  It's how I learn.
4. I'm nervous.  It's my first day doing stuff. 
5. You can't expect me to remember nursing school.  I graduated a year ago.

I hate feeling incompetent.  I hope I sturvive my next 3 shifts.  Three back-to-back 12-hour shifts.  That should be fun.  God help me.