Wednesday, April 29, 2009


Ambition - an earnest desire for some type of achievement or distinction, as power, honor, fame, or wealth, and the willingness to strive for its attainment.

When I was little, I was always told that I need to have ambition and to always strive for the best. I think it's why I am never happy with being second best. Having the thought of success instilled in my mind at such a young age, I became competitive. I knew that although there are so many things in life that is completely out of our hands, we can still steer our life in the direction we choose. Our drive and our motivation to succeed can sometimes be our only light in life's dark tunnel.

I have actually quit my job recently to focus on school. Some people balk at the thought of this especially in this current economic environment. I, on the other hand, think it's the perfect time to be back in school. Others also have doubts since I'm going into a completely different field. I have a Bachelor's degree in Economics and my mom just announced to the entire family (much to my chagrin) that I am applying for a Master's in Nursing. Why am I applying for a master's when I can just get an associate's degree, some asked. To this I reply, Why would I get an associate's degree when I can get a Master's?

I like challenging myself. I don't like settling for something easy because for me, it defeats the purpose of living. Every day is a challenge - a challenge to be a better person, a challenge to better myself spiritually and intellectually. Yes my job pays well but do I feel fulfilled as an individual? Not really. I know I have a lot more to offer and if I don't push myself, I'll never find out how capable I really am.

After my car accident, I felt my life was crumbling before my very eyes. It took me a while to realize that it took a car accident for me to actually have a better perspective on my life. It took a car accident for me to remember that becoming a nurse was something I wanted since I was 5. It took a car accident to realize that I can take charge of my life and it's never too late to start over. The car accident might have shattered my ulna and radius but it strengthened my drive and my motivation. It wasn't an instant epiphany. The people I surrounded myself with at that time was a big part of finding my way back into reality. The reality that my life isn't ruined because of a stumble (or in this case a car accident). I was given a chance to reevaluate my life and start over to which I am eternally grateful.

You see, ambition and success are not really bad things (although some people see it that way). I think people just need to see where I'm coming from with my decision and not judge right away. To some it might seem like I made a whimsical decision but they should see how much work it is to get where I want to go. It's not an easy task. But then again, no one ever said success comes easy (or cheap).


Rachel Everdene said...

Good luck, Debbie! I applaud your decision to come back to school. I applaud it with all my nights of sleeplessness and paper writing and paper editing and research and data coding...

Seriously, best of luck! And call me if you need help!

karengkeng said...

you can do it!

but in all seriousness, db, i never had a doubt in my mind and in my heart that you can do this.

good luck. i'm with you 100 percent. i know how tough it is to be back in school, to be broke (although i doubt you ever will be), to read "required" readings instead of reading for pleasure.. it's no fun sometimes, but it's a choice we all make. and like you said, you can easily take the AA route, but WHY? you'll be selling yourself short and i'm glad you made the decision to take the master's instead.

here's to you *clink* my *best* friend.

sumnboutme said...

awww, thanks guys!!! i know in the end of it all, hard work pays off so i say, bring it on! lol...